I have spent a lifetime seeking authentic spiritual experiences. I sought them in Catholicism, but was labelled an abomination and promised a lifetime of strife just to be accepted. I sought them in Neo-Paganism, but found that the Goddess only fueled the ego to create cults of personality. I sought them in Atheism and Intellectualism, … read more
Recent meditations on my spiritual self and on new tasks assigned to me by my patron, Marbas, led me back to imagery from an astral encounter with him from several months ago. With any growth, new information has to sink into all layers of your being, physical, emotional, mental, spiritual, to be fully assimilated. With … read more
As I described in my last post, I’ve been given a spiritual prohibition against masturbation by my principle patron, Marbas. This is the second time he’s made this request. The first time, I had an unfortunate failure of willpower and gave into the impulse. That resulted in a lengthy period of near impotence, which I … read more
When I engage my spiritual patrons, I communicate with them via creative imagery, projecting myself to another place. With the Covid-19 crisis unfolding around Atlanta, the country, and the world, my spiritual energies have been overtaken by the bandwidth needed to process the stress of daily life. I haven’t had as much spirit time as … read more
I intend for this blog to be a grimoire of sorts and an exploration of how my spirituality and sexuality intersect and enhance one another. To an outsider, the first question someone might reasonably pose is “Book of the Bull?” Why “Bull?” As my readings into mythology by Joseph Campbell relate to me, symbols often … read more
Born Naked… I have studied primitive religious and spiritual practices because I figured they would be “truer” to authentic worship and reverence than religious systems that were constructed in more civilized times. The later systems always had injections of politics and were structured to act as a system of control for a populace, rather than … read more
Visions and Paths When I first started working with the intrinsic energy that humankind possesses (magic), I did it through meditation and what I called “visionquesting.” I know that the term “visionquest” has a specific meaning to Native cultures, and I realize that what I was doing wasn’t truly going on a visionquest, but the … read more
Radical Alternatives In a previous post, I described how I felt pushed out of all of the standard religious, spiritual templates I had attempted over the years, finding each antithetical for various reasons. But, fresh from my radical disappointment in things I once held in reverence, I had an empty space that ached to be … read more
I am naturally drawn to spiritual practices. From an early age, I sought the meaning of things, felt the energy in animals, plants, and nature. I created narratives from the barest threads of story elements, understanding the rich interweave of plot and character to create and express meaning. I can say these feelings came upon … read more
What is this book? I am the Beast of Marbas, a title I have been granted through an alignment to the Demon Marbas. He has called me to create this blog, this site, as a compilation of experiences I have had with Him and with other demons through my religious-spiritual practices. The intent is to … read more