Over the last month, I have had success with aligning myself with Marbas’ will re: Never Climax Alone. Now, the Blood Moon has passed and the NCA working has been solidfied and made reality, so I ponder what waits down the line in my dedication to Marbas. I seek to deepen my connection with Marbas, … read more
In seeking to deepen my spiritual connection to Marbas, I venerate him every day, opening myself his knowledge and energies. I asked him what could I do to further my ascension with him and he responded, as he has before: “Never Climax Alone.” Knowing that I have attempted rounds of NoFap — and failed — … read more
I had the idea of using a milking machine on my cock to enhance Jack Drago’s hypnosis tracks, since some of them reference being milked as part of the technique. But, I wanted to consult my Patrons before I did it, so as not to accidentally break our pacts.
After 108 days of NoFap, I relapsed. It’s hard to admit, honestly. But following the tenets of the 12-step philosophy means to engage in “ruthless honesty,” so I’m admitting the lapse. Because my pledge involved my primary patron, Marbas, I experienced both mundane and magical consequences. The lapsed happened two weeks ago and I spent … read more
My last post from two week ago contained a tarot reading that pointed me to the problem I had stalling out working the steps. I had felt a blockage at Step 6, the step about being willing to surrender to my greater powers. It pointed to my ego being in the way. Turns out that … read more
I’ve always been attracted to the tarot and when I have complicated questions, I sometimes engage the cards to help me understand myself and situations on a subconscious, intuitive level. I did what I thought would be enough for a Step 6, but my sponsor disagreed. He gave me some advice, but it didn’t gel. … read more
My NoFap sponsor directed me to the Narcotics Anonymous (NA) text, It Works: How and Why, to prepared for my Step 6. I picked up a copy from Amazon on my Kindle and read the Step 6 chapter. Immediately, I remembered my previous Step 6 from years ago, and more importantly, who I used to … read more
We’re living in a time of plague, the Spring and Summer of 2020, where the Covid-19 virus flows around the United States on the breath of those exposed or sick. Marbas, a demon associated with the giving and curing of disease, has been empowered. I have word from other practitioners that other demons are likewise … read more
Yesterday, I had the privilege of video chatting with Jack Drago, my mentor and Satanic Priest, to go over my defect inventory as part of my Step 5. While much of that conversation was private, I believe my post on the Step 4 inventory goes over much of my part of it. Because I’m documenting … read more
I’ve been engaging a process of introspection as I prepare to perform my Step 4, cataloging my resentments and fears. For many years in therapy, I’ve been told that I eschew fully owning my personal power and capitulate to the dictates of others. For some months, I have been told that I am blocked from … read more